Well, this guy can stay in my room, I'll tell you that much. Because you took your sweet-ass time coming down here.these gentlemen will miss their flights. Did you fall asleep or did you pass out? That's enough, Billy. You think so? - I fell asleep by the pool for a few hours. (slurps ) - Hey, Carl, what's up? - Nothing much, Billy. Oh, really, fool? Stop looking at me, swan. I go on first and clean the hair.Ĭonditioner is better. Juanita said he'd be down in a few minutes. And our operations manager Carl Alphonse.

Have you all met? Eric Gordon, my executive vice president. Sorry doesn't put the Triscuit crackers in my stomach, does it, Carl? I'm sorry to have kept you waiting. If you'd told me there were Triscuit crackers. Oh, that boy's a fine piece of work all right. You gotta dress yourself up and look nice, too. Now you get yourself upstairs and get ready. You shouldn't pull that crap in front of your father's business associates. There's nothing to worry about, big fella. They'll treat you real respectable, like. Call the zoo!Īll the people at the zoo are very nice, penguin. Don't you dare run away!Ĭome here, Mr Penguin! I'm one of the good guys, penguin. There no penguin! - (squawks ) It's too damn hot for a penguin to be just walkin' around here.

(squawking ) Holy jeez! Lookee what we got here.

Nudie-magazine day! Nudie-magazine day! Nudie-magazine day! What's today? It's nudie-magazine day! Watch out, butler! Man, why did I have so many drinks? I can't remember. Billy Madison Script Resources: Billy Madison Script at Script Fly (PDF,$) Billy Madison Script - 6/2/94 at Script City (PDF,$) Billy Madison Transcript at Springfield! Note: Multiple links are listed since (a) different versions exist and (b) many scripts posted become unavailable over time. BALL OF FIRE.CHARLES BRACKETT-BILLY WILDER.8. Here you can search our entire catalog of contstantly updated movie scripts. Stupid parent trying to shift the blame.I don't think anyone including Adam Sandler expected a 6 year old to read the script. If you can't read a script you can't raise a child or be responsible for your own decisions either apparently. There's something important I was supposed to do today. ~ Suntan lotion is good for me ~ You protect me ~ Tee-hee-hee Oh, the sun tries to burn me, but you won't let it, will ya? Ultraviolet rays - bad.

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